Areas of Expertise
Couples Counselling
A romantic relationship is one of the closest we have as humans, and choosing a partner, and staying together through life's twists and turns is rarely simple; so when we choose to get married and raise a family together, unsurprisingly this only adds to the complexity.
Whether you have the odd tiff, full-blown arguments or you have simply stopped having fun very few relationships exist conflict-free. When this (one of our most important relationships) begins to falter, our health and happiness often suffers; and while for many of us our first instinct is to try and work through problems alone, it can be incredibly useful to seek outside help.
One route you may choose is couples counselling, a form of talking therapy designed for those in a relationship.
Family/Systemic Therapy
Family therapy, also referred to as systemic therapy, is an approach that works with families and those who are in close relationships to foster change. These changes are viewed in terms of the systems of interaction between each person in the family or relationship.
It is understandable that families and those in relationships sometimes get into difficulties due to their differences, or feel the strain when loved ones have troubles.
The aim of therapy is to work on these problems by encouraging family members and loved ones to help and empathise with each other. They are given the opportunity to understand and appreciate each other's needs, build on family strengths and ultimately make useful changes in their lives and relationships.
Counselling for children and young people.
Children and young people experience problems and difficulties at home, at school, and with friends. It is difficult for adults to talk about their problems and concerns, this is also true for children.
As a parent or caregiver, you may have concerns about the child or children in your family, and can sometimes feel that you don’t know how to help or where to start. Giving the problem or problems a name, and identifying what it is that needs to change, is a great place to start.
In an initial assessment with children, I like to see the parent or parents together with the child. Not only does this make it more comfortable for the child, it can also help them to have a spokesperson to support them. As the child becomes more familiar with the counselling process they may prefer to see the counsellor alone, but this is their choice.
I would advise a minimum of six sessions to explore what is happening, when it is happening, how the child would like it to be, and working on goal setting and achievement. It might take longer but that is okay too.
The tools I use are solution focused, transactional analysis, and systemic therapy, which tend to look at the here and now, and the future, rather than focusing on what has gone wrong in the past, so what can we do differently today and tomorrow, not what should we have done.
Solution-focused brief therapy
Solution-focused brief therapy - also known as solution-focused therapy - is an approach to psychotherapy based on solution building rather than problem-solving.
Although it acknowledges present problems and past causes, it predominantly explores an individual's current resources and future hopes - helping them to look forward and use their own strengths to achieve their goals.
As its name suggests, solution-focused brief therapy is considered a time-limited approach, however the technique is often incorporated into other long-term therapy types and effects can be long-lasting.
It was developed in America in the 1980's by husband and wife team Steve de Shazer and Insoo Kim Berg, along with their team at the Brief Family Centre. Together they founded the therapy on seven basic philosophies and assumptions.
The two main theoretical approaches that I use in counselling are Transactional Analysis and Systemic Therapy.
Transactional Analysis was conceived by Eric Berne from his foundation in psychoanalytic therapy and combines other therapeutic approaches such as analytical, behavioural and systematic therapy. Very simplistically there are three ego states, Child, Parent and Adult and this is where transactions with others originate from in the form of words, thoughts and actions.
In understanding how we relate to others and what works and what feels uncomfortable or upsetting, can then lead on to having choices about how we interact in the here and now.
Systemic therapy is most often used to explore family, relationship and organisations interactions. The concept is that we as individuals are influenced by all those who we have contact with, and our responses to others, affects how they relate to us, and us to them.
In relationship therapy or counselling all those involved need to agree to take part and communicate with each other to bring about a change. The therapy is about the here and now but also explores how previous relationships might influence how we think and behave today.
In family counselling I will usually see the parent or parents initially and then other members of the family as appropriate. Sometimes it is not necessary to involve the child or children depending on their age and understanding of the counselling process.
As the counsellor I am not the expert, I am there to help you understand yourself and your relationship to others, the decision to make changes comes from you and I can’t provide magical answers or solutions.
